CHAOS AND CHANGE TAKE OVER THE WORLD

CHAOS AND CHANGE TAKE OVER THE WORLD

By Nalaé White

I am not a person who handles chaos well.  When it comes my way, I tend to ignore it until I know how to resolve it or it works itself out—whichever comes first. Moving to Los Angeles was chaos. When I first got here, I didn’t have an internship, my car situation was in shambles (and even if it wasn’t, driving here is a whole other drama), my schedule was all over the place, and some of my luggage was missing. I was homesick from the moment I landed. There was so much chaos in my head that I didn’t know how to resolve, so I did what I always do. I ignored it. I went to Santa Monica Beach at sunset with my family and my camera. When I set foot on the sand, put my eye to my viewfinder, and saw the clear California waves rolling amongst themselves before crashing to the shore, I finally felt like I could breathe. So I did, and I let go of all of the stress and worry that I was carrying because it wasn’t real. It was just fear. Fear that once I got to California, I would feel lost and confused. Fear that I wouldn’t land on my feet. Moving across the country when you’ve never left the East Coast before is an enormous change. These next few months are going to bring a lot of it, but change is a friend that I have always welcomed and it. Even if I freaked out about it for a second.